Big Brother is going to be a ring bearer y’all!
One of our beloved family members is getting married in a few weeks and Big Brother was asked to be their ring bearer. Now this wasn’t his first invitation to walk down the aisle. Another family member got married last summer and Big Brother was supposed to be their ring bearer, but Dear Hubby’s deployment ran an interference on that play.
How so? Well, I’m not the best long distance driver, so driving wasn’t an option. And flying solo with the boys would have seriously challenged my mental health. See, Big Brother has a fear of flying and Baby Brother was only seven months old at the time. I haven’t even started talking about the logistical nightmare of going through security and traveling with all of our luggage and carseats. As a sad result, our family had to reluctantly attend the wedding via Facebook. You know how that goes…you anxiously wait for family members and friends to post photos on Facebook in real time so you can at least feel somewhat a part of the joyous occasion.
So now our family has a chance to redeem ourselves. Dear Hubby has no deployments/TDYs/important work stuff scheduled during the time of this wedding. In addition, the location is within reasonable driving distance. That works perfect for us because Dear Hubby and I can control the environment a little better to help make things more predictable for Big Brother. Another plus is that we are familiar with the city that the wedding will be in. All of these things give me a level of comfort. But I must admit that Big Brother being in this wedding has me a little anxious. It would be pretty stressful for him to meltdown in the middle of someone’s wedding, even if it is family. Despite a case of the nerves, I’m choosing to be optimistic and I have every reason to be.
Big Brother has come a long way. And when I say a long way, I mean a loooonnnnngggg way! There used to be a time when large crowds would make him very anxious. This was part of his issues with church. But since he performed his breakout role as Joseph in the church Christmas play, he’s done a lot better with self regulating himself in situations that are outside of his normal routine.
I recently started talking to Big Brother about the wedding and how he was going to be the ring bearer. He got all excited, even though he had no clue about what that was. I pulled up YouTube on my phone and showed him videos of ring bearers. I grabbed a small decorative pillow from my bed and told him that there was going to be a ring on a pillow and he had to hold the pillow and walk down an aisle. I put the pillow in his hands and off we went down the hallway, practicing his walk down the aisle. It was hilarious to see him laughing and flopping all over the place with the pillow!
After our first rehearsal, I explained to him that he would have to wear a tuxedo for the wedding and that he was going to look very handsome. Big Brother smiled and laughed. Later that day, we all hopped in the car and drove to the tuxedo shop to get Big Brother fitted. He did a pretty good job with letting the salesperson measure him. He sure had the wiggles though! But that’s okay. I remember a time, not too long ago, in which he would throw a complete fit if he was asked to try on clothes. Thank God for progress!
I have a plan to help Big Brother out with his ring bearer gig. I’m going to use the same method that I used to get him ready for his part in the church play. What’s the method? Well, it goes a little something like this…explain, practice, visual, drill, perform. I know you are probably saying to yourself, “What in the world is this girl talking about?” Let me break it down for you.
- First, I thoroughly explain everything to Big Brother on his level.
- Then, I let him practice the activity.
- Next, I videotape him doing it.
- After he finishes, I show him the video so he can get a good visual of how it is supposed to be done.
- Then we do drills over and over on what he is supposed to do by practicing and watching the video.
- On the day of, we practice right before the event. Then off he goes to perform!
This method worked wonders for the church play, so I’m hoping it will work the same magic for the wedding.
Oh, and I forgot to tell you…I’m in the wedding too! That works out great for us. Dear Hubby can stand at the back with Big Brother and pretty much tell him to walk up to Mommy.
I can see Big Brother now at the moment of truth, grinning and beboping his way down the aisle, all while swinging around the pillow! 🙂
I’ll be sure to let you all know how the wedding turned out. It’s almost a guarantee that I’ll have some fun and entertaining things to share!