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When Your Child’s Feelings are Hurt

I took my son to the playground this past weekend. It was cool outside, a big change from the 100+ degree weather we’ve had lately. There were many other parents and children at the playground too, taking advantage of the nice weather.

My son is very friendly and will often walk up to other children his age, smiling and laughing. If he really likes them, he’ll talk in his babble language to them.

My son loves to swing, so we started off with that first. After the swing, we moved over to the other playground equipment with a slide and tunnel.

My son enjoys sitting in the tunnel and looking out the peep holes as I play peekaboo with him.

There were several children on the slide and playground area. My son climbed up the steps and ran to the tunnel. I wasn’t too far behind him.

He got to the tunnel and a little boy was sitting in there. My son smiled and grinned at him. Then he sat in the tunnel with him. The little boy looked at my son and said, “NO!!!”

My son cried. His feelings were hurt that the little boy didn’t want him to sit in the tunnel or play with him.

I said, “Son it’s okay. Come around this way.” I redirected his attention to the slide.

As a mom, it hurts your feelings when someone is mean to your child. Now of course, this little boy had no real intentions of hurting my son’s feelings, but it made me think about some things.

I have to teach my son that sometimes, people do things that are not nice. When that happens, we shouldn’t return evil for evil or lash back out at them. We should still show them the love of God and be nice to them.

My son eventually forgot about it and went back to playing with the other kids. Which leads me to lesson #2: Don’t hold grudges, learn to forgive. Easier said than done sometimes, but this is all part of what Jesus would have us do.

How do you deal with situations like this when your child’s feelings are hurt?

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{ 3 comments… add one }
  • MOMSWEB July 24, 2009, 10:30 PM

    Girrrrl, don't even talk about it. My 13 year old got his feelings hurt today by something he HEARD his basketball coach said about him. You don't know how badly I wanted to approach the coach. The Mama Bear in me came out! I did, however, use this opportunity to teach him about emotions and using them to make him stronger. He played his butt off tonight! Mama was so proud!

  • Ms. Wanda July 23, 2009, 8:27 PM

    Hi, Christian Mommy Writer:)
    Thank you so much I'm still laughing at the breeze:)

    You know you are so right. It's tough as you get older. There is a woman that I know that I speak to all the time and I noticed today that she never says Hello, I just always reach out first. I want to stop speaking to her but, I know I can't and don't want to be like her because then I think I'd be holding a grudge.

  • Kathryn July 23, 2009, 3:08 PM

    Thanks so much for commenting! Yes, I didn't even know my comments weren't working so I was glad to be able to fix them! 🙂

    Yes, already my husband hasn't even deployed and I am trying to prepare myself because I know the time will come when he will. Pray is huge thing even know I pray the Lord will prepare me and help me when it comes.

    That is great marriage advice! I think keeping up your appearance is so important and also being spontaneous! I like what you said about surprises too. You are right about spending time with your spouse before kids. I don't have any yet and there is lots of things we do that I am sure would be harder with kids.

    Living in a military town its hard to find friends who don't have kids, but I do have a few who don't. But those who do have kids sometimes I will babysit for them and that is always fun!

    That must be tough seeing you baby's feelings get hurt! Its hard to control when its someone else's child.
    Have a wonderful day! God Bless!

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